Is it nice..?

Vice is my new addiction

Posted in Is it Nice..? by Ade Chong on January 16, 2010

I spent all afternoon listening to the XX and reading Vice which has to be my favourite christmas present of 2009 from Mei. I’m currently going through the chapter about drugs and not only is it interesting, it’s fucking hilarious. These are some of my favourite articles:

A Giant Chinese Finger Trap Made of Rainbows Tried to Suck Me Into The Sky

I tried 2C-T-21 about a week ago. While walking around my neighborhood, I got so hot that I had to take off my shirt. My body was actually steaming. I decided to go swimming in a nearby urban river but instead threw my house keys into the water just to see what it looked like when they splashed.

Later that night I collapsed on a bench and watched the trees lining the roads slowly grow genitalia—splintery leafed penises and big sappy vaginas. I sat watching this in awe with two friends while taking an occasional whippit, but after a while a passing woman suddenly started beating the shit out of her boyfriend ten feet in front of me. It was more of a downer than a thousand Chris Farley overdoses. When the cops showed up I was climbing one of the vagina trees to get a better view.

Once I smoked 50 mg after taking a special type of antidepressant that makes it impossible for your body to break down the drug. I began having a vicious argument with my left hand, speaking from both sides—my hand’s point of view and my face’s. I said, “I’m sorry. I will never do drugs again,” and my hand replied, “It’s too late!”

– D. H. Ticklish experiments with obscure and lesser-known psychedelics in Vice’s article A Giant Chinese Finger Trap Made of Rainbows Tried to Suck Me Into The Sky.

Magic Jews

Then it started to rain. It was too dark to write so I just lay on my back and listened to April showers pelt the tin roof. I was in total ecstacy. It felt as if each raindrop was falling from the sky to give my eardrums a handjob.

– Hamilton Morris after consuming LSD in a cabin in the woods (with no water/electricity, occupied by psychedelic Jews). From the Vice article titled Magic Jews.

Hamster Party Throwdown

At the start of the second hour of competition, the phrase “Draft Dodgers Rule” is spelled out in coke on the dresser. Both subjects have worked more than halfway through the huge letters of blow, each starting at separate ends.

FIGHTERS’ COMMENTS
Dan:
“Our crew is the draft dodgers because we’re like…draft dodgers. That’s what we’d be if there was a draft. We’d fuckin’ dodge it.”
Dash (to Dan): “I’ll sniff coke off your dick if you’ll sniff coke off mine.”

– Vice stocks a hotel room with 2 guys, 50 beers, two bottles of Wild Turkey and six grams of coke to be consumed in 5 hours. From the Vice article Hamster Party Throwdown.

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